I provide Individual and couples/marital counseling to adults only. The following are specific areas of specialization.
II specialize in the field of sex-addiction having worked in this field for nearly 15 years. Addiction can be complicated. It is a combination of problems that include emotional, pyshcological, biological, and spiritual issues. It is not enough to address one aspect of your addiction thinking, "if I only fix the one thing" then I'll be ok. The brain is wired to accept sexual cues and with the advent of the internet, digital porn provides sexual imagery at a rate that our brain was not designed to handle. Because of how the brain responds to stimulation it will gravitate to what it perceives as more stimulating. Like other substances, what does it for me today doesnt satisfy tomorrow and therefore the pursuit of habit is formed and greater and greater quantities are needed to feel satiated. Pornagraphy desensitizes a person, leads them to objectify, and robbs them of real intimacy and emotional connection. It also robs you of time which impacts all other areas of your life. Addiction leaves you empty despite of all the promises it offers. Yes, there is great anticipation and relief when you give into the addiction, but it is always followed up with regret, condemnation (internal and external), and a loss of hope. You've satisfied your lust at the moment and are bound and determined not to repeat it right up to the point where your thoughts give way to action and you're left with despair. I can help you! All I ask is that you are willing to take a look at it. Therapy isn't magic. You won't fix you're problems just by sitting in my office. But, if you are willing to explore the dynamics of your life and challenge what you've come to believe about yourself and your situation, I believe hope can be found.
If your partner or spouse has an addiction to pornography or has broken your trust through infidelity, then you may be dealing with a myriad of emotional, psychological, spiritual and even physical problems due to relational trauma. Similar to PTSD there are many symptoms including hypersensitivity to people and environments, irritibility, inability to sleep, reduced appetites, anger, anxiety, depression, and body aches and pains. The violation you've experienced is a traumatic event that has impacted your relationship and has the portential to create significant problems with your self-esteem, body image, value, and worth. The fear that comes with the anxiety can be overwhelming at times, which may lead to total breakdown in communication further complicating an already difficult situation. For many it is difficult to reconcile how someone you love could do this and why can't they stop. You may have taken up a position that tells your partner its their problem and they need to fix it. While the perpetrator must address his or her addiction, the partner must also process through their emotions and understand the role tthey can play in the recovery of the relationship. If you've experienced these types of issues please call today for an appointment.
It's easy to get along with each other when newly in love or when everything else in life is running smoothly. But, throw in the duties of life, keeping up with kids, problems at work, nosey in-laws or well meaning friends and all of a sudden you're frustrated, angry, and sarcastic to the very person who should be there to help you. It seems as if getting along with each other has become the exception rather than the rule. After years of this "crazy cycle", you develop specific styles of relating, which either involve intense verbal altercations or time spent avoiding each other in silence. In either scenario there is no communication, and if you're not there already, will end up living life as roomates having lost intamacy and freedom. I can help you! If you're tired and ready for change please commit to getting help today, even if it's just one of you coming. There is a WAY to communicate that does not hurt those that love and depend on you. Call me today!
Depression is cruel! Depression tempts you with the idea that "things" should be better, different, enjoyable and that life is out there for the taking. Do you hear yourself say, "but not for me." When you are depressed, negative self-talk often errupts into a cascade of self-condemnation and points out every reason known and unknown to man that happiness, contentment, and joy are unattainable. You don't have any difficulty naming the things that are broken or causing problems, but you can't seem to figure out the solutions. I can help you! Sometimes you need an objective person to help identify the patterns and dynamics in your life that are keeping you bound up and locked into depression. Sometimes it takes an objective person to help you identify and establish reasonable and obtainable goals and also provide the proper accountability and encouragement. Make an appointment today!
Anxiety can be a scary thing to experience. On one hand it can be a mild irratation that keeps you from sleep or makes you feel uncomfortable in certain situations. It can also bring on symptoms that produce uncontrollable fear and physical sensations that make you feel you're having a heart attack. While some levels of anxiety need additional treatment with medication, many can be dealt with by addressing the patterns of thought and how they influence behavior. I can help you understand the process and educate you on the mechanical nature of how thoughts can provoke action and how what we believe or perceive can become our reality. Understanding how our physiology is linked to our thought life can help you gain perspective about your ability to control anxiety. Like addiction and depression, anxiety may be linked to emotional, psychological, physical, and spiritual issues. I can help you! If you are willing to explore and challenge the who, what, where, when and how, I believe you will unlimately find relief.
I am a Christian. As such I make an effort to ascribe to what Christ taught in how to live life. Thankfully, I also believe in grace because I don't alway get it right. If you are wanting a Christian perspective in your counseling than I'm prepared to use the Bible as the source for truth. I won't force you down a road through judgment or condemnation nor will I beat you up with the Bible. If you claim Christ as your savior then I want to help you figure out what is keeping you ineffective and inefficient in your life and relationships. I believe many emotions and "feelings" can be born out of the discrepancy between what you believe and what you practice. I'm excited to help you with your struggles. Just like anyone who suffers with mental and behavioral health problems, many of our root issues are connected to the distorted viewpoints we hold about ourselves and our situations. I can help you! Call today for an appointment. Ask about discounts for referrals through your local church.
Kenneth D. Miles, MA, LPC
1015 Central Parkway North
San Antonio, Texas 78232
Phone (210) 999-0438
Fax (210) 404-9750
Monday and Tuesday 9:00 - 6:00
Wednesday - Friday 9:00 - 5:00